Saudade

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“Saudade” is a Portuguese word that has no translation to any other language. I will try to explain: Saudade is the feeling of missing someone or something. It is a deep feeling of emptiness towards what we are used to have near our heart.
I’m away from home for six weeks now and sometimes I try to understand what I really miss from Portugal. Of what/who do I have “saudade”. My mother gets upset when I say that what I miss the most is my dog. To be honest , although I live with my parents, I have a independent life in Portugal, so I talk with them maybe one hour at night, and don’t even do it every day. Here, I can also talk with them every day; we can share our day and laugh about it. Actually I noticed that my parents only tell me the “good news” and they try to not show if they are upset with something, so I can say that our relation is getting better when I’m away! Sure it is not so truthful, but fights are avoided at all cost. But I cannot pet my dog by skype! I don’t have a fluffy thing jumping on me every time I get to my dorm…
What else do I miss? I miss the water. I live in Lisbon so I can see the Tagus river every day, and I can easily see the blue ocean if I want to. In here the sea is 11 to 13 hours apart by train. There is a small river in the city, but is not the same.
I miss doing the crosswords in “Publico” with a friend, I miss taking my coffee in “Esplanada”, I miss talking in Portuguese, I miss watching the news every morning…. Being here and missing these silly things only shows me that the most important things in our live are only special and noticeable when we are apart from them.
This experience and the people that I met here are always going be in my heart but not always in my mind. They have changed me and I’m sure I will never be the same, but in a few years they will be a shadow in my life, a good dream. I will be missing them even without noticing it, because they will always part of who I became. I’m happy that I will never see them again, like this they will be even more valuable. Priceless. Thanks to Saudade.

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